Right now

Right now, my brain is as stuffy as my nose. I’m scattered and trying to throw ideas down on paper and finish books and I can’t find my focus. I feel like I’m a kid who has eaten a dozen pieces of Halloween candy. And I am very in touch with children who have eaten too much candy and it’s not even Halloween yet! My head is crowded with “What does a fox say” and it’s seemingly on repeat. Between the re-runs of Duck Dynasty my high schooler watches and the World Series games I am forced to watch, my head is cluttered with beards. I am sick and tired of men with way too much facial hair. I can’t tell you how happy I am that Adam finally shaved his off. Take note Red Sox, real men don’t name their beards.

I find myself staying away from real topics and ideas. I have so much to say and am forgetting how to begin when all I need to do is go word by word. But I find myself with a five day weekend filled with deep breaths. I intend to throw out my grand expectations and trade them for some more down-to-earth ones. Expectations that I will find myself meeting instead of making myself feel awful and riddled with guilt.

Until I can get it myself and my life unstuffed, I’m going to sit here with my box of tissues and my chai that it is way too late to be drinking but it’s my meal replacement plan and surf the ‘net while my kids argue about who is taking up too much room on the big couch all while counting the minutes to bedtime….theirs and mine.
Photo on 10-30-13 at 8.24 PM

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