I’m filled with sentimentality lately. Maybe it’s from sheer exhaustion. Maybe it’s because I’m all too quickly approaching a single digit number of weeks left living in this place that I call home. Or maybe it’s because I’m getting older and I’m able to appreciate the true golden moments in a bigger way than I have before.
This weekend was Homecoming…and of course it was filled with moments that I’ll feel in my heart for longer than I’ll remember what they looked like.
There was the moment Alex’s best friend(who goes to another school) came to chauffeur him to the dance. They drove off with a cooler filled with San Pellegrino and went to go pick up Alex’s date. I felt how true and treasured their friendship was even as they lead different lives. And I felt proud and inspired as I watched them drive down the road.
Then there was the moment I took a picture of Alex and his date on the golf course at the country club and their smiles and sweetness bubbled in my heart. And I was suddenly racing toward the day when I’m going to have to share him with another girl and I kept thanking my lucky stars and reminding myself that he’s only sixteen and I still have time with just him.
But then I know how these years are flying even though the time between 5 o’clock and bedtime can feel like an eternity. And when he handed me his class picture and he looked like he could be 20 I got all choked up and for the umpteenth time in recent days I found myself telling the little guys my contacts were irritating my eyes and I was certainly not crying.
I want to yell at the heavens and beg for the clocks to stop. I want to stay in these moments, in this collection of days, that I hold so dear. The future is big and scary and oh so far from everything I love. But the second hand keeps ticking and I have to remember to savor these moments and have faith-something that does not come naturally to me-that there will be more moments for me to catalog into my heart in the days to come and revel in the fact that I can dig deep and recall all the ones I’ve already stored away.